JOKES

JOKES........of sardar:


A sardar went to a bank to open a S.B. A/C. After seeing the Form, he had gone to DELHI for filling up. U know why? Form says " FILL UP IN CAPITAL ".

A Teacher lecturing on population - In India after every 10 sec a women gives birth to a kid. A Sardar stands up - we must find & stop her!


Sardar had twins; he named them Tin & Martin. Again had twins & named Peter & Repeater. Again twins & named Max & Climax.Again the same.
Disgusted Sardar named them TIRED & RETIRED!

A sardharji photographer focusing a dead body's face in a funeral function.
Suddenly all relatives beat him. Why? He said "SMILE PLEASE"

Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense.
Sardar: The future tense is "you will go to jail".
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Sardar gets ready ,wears tie, coat, goes out, climbs tree, sits on the branch regularly. A man asks why he does this. Sardar: "I've been promoted as branch manager."

Sardarji standing below a tube light with a open mouth.........WHY? Because his doctor advised him "Today's dinner should be light".

Sardarji was filling up application form for a job. He was not sure also what to be filled in column "Salary Expected". After much thought he wrote : Yes!

One sardarji Professor asked a plumber to come to his college. U know why?
Because he wanted to check where the question paper is leaking...
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Sardar told his servant: Go and water the plants.
Servant: It's already raining.
Sardar: So what take an umbrella and go.

Santa! Your daughter has died! Depressed, Sardar jumps from 100thfloor. At 50th floor he remembers I don't have a daughter! At 25th floor: I'm unmarried!
At 10th floor: I'm Banta not Santa

On a romantic date Sardar's girl friend asks him "Darling on our
engangement will you give me a ring? He said "Ya, sure what's your phone number?

A dog was chasing a Sardar and the Sardar was laughing.
A bystander: why are u laughing?
Sardar: I have an Aitel phone but still Hutch network is following me.


Sardar wins 20 crore from Rs. 20 lottery ticket. Dealer gave 11 crore after
deducting tax. Angry Sardar: "Give me 20 crore or else return my 20 Rs
back.!


A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket
match. All were busy writing except one Sardarji. He wrote "DUE TO RAIN,
NO MATCH!"


Postman:- I have to come 5 miles to deliver you this packet.
Sardar:- why did u come so far? Instead u could have posted it....
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What does a sardar do after taking a xerox?
He will compare it with the original for any spelling mistakes.

Sardar and his wife buy coffee in a shop. Sardar says: Drink quickly.
Wife asks: why?? Sardar says: hot coffee Rs5 and cold coffee Rs10.

Sardar's wish: when i die, i wanna to die like my grandpa who died
peacefuly in his sleep not screaming like all the passengers in the car
he was driving....

Sardar at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you
call modern art ?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!

Sardar was writing something very slowly.
Friend asked:" Why r u writing so slowly?
Sardar: "I'm writing to my 6 yr old son, he can't read very fast.

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Flash news: A two seater plane crashed in a Graveyard in Punjab. Local
sardars have so far found 500 bodies and are still digging for more..

A man asked Sardarji, why Manmohan singh goes walking at evening not in the
morning. Sardarji replied ''Arey bhai Manmohan is PM not AM''.

A sardar was very fond of sensational and detective novels, but he always
started reading from the middle. A friend of his asked why he did so? "It'z
doubly interesting", said the
Sardar. "to start from the middle keeps one curious not only about its
conclusion but also about its beginning.

Sardarji was standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed. His wife
asked: what you are doing? He said: i'm seeing how i look while sleeping.

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Once a sardar was looking at a WANTED poster & was wondering -

Saala wanted tha to photo kheenchne ke baad use jaane kyon diya ?

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Sardar car ki battery change karwane gaya ...

Mechanic - Sahab, Exide ki daal doon ?

Sardar - Nahin yaar, dono side ki daal de, warna phir problem hogi.

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A sardar on an interview for the post of detective was asked a question -

Interviewer - Who killed Gandhiji ?

Sardar - Thanks for giving me the job, I will investigate.

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A Sardar was fond of detective novels, he always read from the middle, why?

Its double interesting. It builds curiosity not only about its end but also

its beginning !

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Sardar returns book to library, bangs it on table & says - What a shit ? "I

read the whole book, too many character, no story at all" ?.

Librarian : So, you are the one who took the Telephone Directory....

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2 Days of Powercut in India made life miserable. Worst affected was

Amritsar

where all the SARDARS were stuck for 48 hrs. on Escalaters.....

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Two Sardars are driving a Car, one puts on the indicator and asks the other

to check whether it is working.

He puts his head out and says - YES..NO..YES..NO..YES..NO

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Sardarji, tell me ...., what is the meaning of SMS ?

Sardar angrily said, i know - it means....

S - Sardaron ke

M - Mazak udane ki

S - Service

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Banta : Oye to har SMS ko do baar kyom bhej raha hai ?

Santa : Kyunki tujhe agar ek forward karna ho to dusra tere paas rahe !!!